


New Beginnings

by DTA2013



Series: A New World [2]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2018-08-13 10:05:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7972861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DTA2013/pseuds/DTA2013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It all started here. Her family shunned her. She was an outcast, all alone. Until she met her. This is their journey. The lies that nearly destoryed destroyed her. To the time she walked into the FBI. Where friendships were formed and the pain of loss that nearly crippled her. Prequel to A New World. Please R&R.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As always I don't not own criminal minds… Just the OC. Please R&R.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It all started here. Her family shunned her. She was an outcast, all alone. Until she met her. This is their journey. The lies that nearly destroyed her. To the time she walked into the FBI. Where friendships were formed and the pain of loss that nearly crippled her. Prequel to A New World. Please R&R. Femslash as always

I can just hear them now. The problem child, the strange one. Not wanted. Not needed. Nothing to them other than their flesh and blood. It wasn't my fault. It's not my fault I can hear things and move things. Although trying to strangle him was my doing. But he raised his hand to me, calling me vile names. They act as though I asked for this as though I wanted it.

I am a problem and a problem they no longer want. Not that they truly wanted me in the first place. I heard the term often enough, a mistake and given their faith they couldn't terminate me. Just now I am a bigger problem.

"We are sending you to your grandfather in France." His face blank and cold as he spoke to me.

I could only nod. I already knew. The second I had let slip about his affair, I was pushed out the door, just as quick as her. What if he doesn't want me either? What if he sees me as a freak, a problem, a disgrace to the family.

I heard my mother the other day say the family home was cursed and that father John was going to bless the house in a few days. I guess that means I will be gone before then. Nice to know that is what they truly think of me. A demon. Why else would our. Sorry. Their home need blessing? Let's just hope my grandfather doesn't turf me ou,t as then I'll have nowhere to go. Not wanted by anyone. Is there truly a point to life? I find myself asking that question a lot lately.

* * *

I have been on this campus for the past eight months, the girl I share a dorm with gives me such a headache. And I thought my mother was fake. There again I am still here talking to her, I know she took pity on me. I also know all her friends think I am a freak, the sad fact is I am a freak.

I have tried so hard to blend in here, although I doubt I am. Some days I wonder if it is just the thoughts I can hear or are they truly calling me these names to my face? Wish my grandfather had taught me more, he was the only person that truly wanted me.

I tried to contact my uncle, he laughed and told me to go to hell. I'm unsure he believed me or if it was the fact of what his brother did to him. My father shunned him, and then both my parents shunned me.

"Hi"

I couldn't help but swallow as I looked at her. The first time I laid eyes on her, she took my breath away. At first I wasn't sure she was talking to me, but her gaze never altered.

"I'm Amy"

I nodded slightly as I held out my hand. "Emily" I mumbled.

"I believe we have a class together?" I frown slightly as I look at her.

"We do?" I can't help the sceptical glance.

"Psych"

"Yeah" okay now I am feeling like a hormonal teenage girl. But my god those eyes, I back away slightly. For the first time in years I can't feel anything, I can't see her thoughts.

"Are you okay?"

I nod slightly. Blank, void, nothingness. I push slightly maybe she is like me?

"Are you sure?" She asks me again.

Okay maybe not. "Yeah, I'm good" I finally answer, oh I could drown in those eyes.

"Fancy sitting with me?"

I'm screwed! Is this love at first sight? Or am I just drooling over the most attractive women on campus? I look around, wondering if someone is yanking my chain, let's get the freak. Wouldn't be the first time.

"Why?" and the dumbest question of the century goes to me.

"Why not?"

That's a million dollar question right there. I can't help shrug slightly. "You'll lose any popularity points if you sit with me." Oh boy, I really need to think before I open my mouth and words come out.

"Didn't know there was a contest" this time she smirks at me.

I'm starting to wonder if she is one of those mean girls. Be friends with the freak, let them get close then rip the carpet right from underneath them. "Well, it's just that." Yes I sound like a hormonal teenager.

"Is there a law saying I can't sit with you?" She raises her eyebrow at me.

"No."

"If you sat with me would that make it better?" I can hear the amusement in her voice as she looks at me.

"Okay" I do have a high IQ, honest. Just not when there's her.

"So that makes it completely different? Or am I missing the point completely?"

Okay how to explain that I am a social outcast. "You're missing the point."

"Okay and the point you are trying to make is?" I can still hear the amusement in her voice.

I sigh slightly. "You won't have many friends if people see you with me."

"Good job I don't want many friends then."

I wonder if I've reached the point where someone has just taken pity on me. Maybe seen me on my own, one too many times. "I'm not a charity case." Really, Emily engage brain!

"I know you're not, and I don't really do charity."

I look at her again, before I look around, but again I hear and feel nothing. I am not sure if that gives me slight comfort or it makes me on edge? Maybe both. I give a slight nod. "Okay"

"So what subjects are you taking?"

"Psych." Okay maybe she knows that since she brought it up, but right now words fail me.

"I know." I could hear the slight amusement in her voice. "I'm not going to hurt you."

I frown at her now. I can't help the slight sigh that escapes my lips. "How can you say that?"

I watch as she shrugs. "I have nothing to gain if I hurt you."

What the hell? Have I slipped into an alternative universe or something? Am I dreaming? I can't help the blank look I give her. Now I am just waiting, is this a trap?

"We'll see." I mumble slightly.

She nods at me slightly. "May I sit with you in class?"

I swallow slightly. "If you want." I can't help averting my gaze.

"I'll see you in class then." Her hand rested slightly on my shoulder. "Everyone needs a friend Emily."

I can only nod as I watch her walk away. I close my eyes slightly. I'm either screwed or she is playing a cruel game.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Why does she think I need a friend? I've done alright on my own so far. Just so we are clear on this my family have disowned me. My grandfather is dead, which means I now have no family. In the space of a year. As for friends, let's just say I once had a few friends we were close but now, we no longer talk to one another. Don't get me wrong it wasn't through lack of trying. But just like my family had done, they blamed me.

Anyway, that is no longer important, what is important right now is seeing if she truly was yanking my chain. My hand rests gently on the door, I take a moment to gather myself. I didn't even realise I was holding my breath until she turned around. A broad smile hit her lips as she motioned for me to join her. I couldn't help looking behind me, yes I have a lot of self-doubt. Seriously, do you blame me? No one of their own free will, wants to be my friend, let alone make a point of it.

"Are you going to join me?" I can hear the amusement in her voice as she speaks.

I nod slightly. "Okay." I give her a slight smile, as she moves her coat so I can sit down. Again I feel like a hormonal teenager, I swallow slightly.

"I won't bite," again she smiles at me. "Just so we are clear."

It amazes me, I can feel nothing when I look at her, no fear, no pain, nothing. Let's hope me allowing someone close, someone I may actually be able to call my friend. This could either end in tears or develop into something more.

"Good to know." This time I give her a slight smile before opening the book as we waited for class to start.

The class seemed to be over so fast, but there again my focus wasn't solely on what he was saying but the woman that was sat beside me, she was listening so intently to him. It gave me time to study her, she gives off this calming effect, there is just something about her that settles me. Extremely weird.

"So you fancy joining me for lunch?"

"Sure." I pause for a moment. "What class do you have next?" I ask as I open the door for her.

"I don't. I am only taking one class, if it wasn't for my job I wouldn't be here."

"What do you do?" I ask, I can feel the glares off people.

They seem just as confused as me. The hot chick with the school freak. They wonder if I am paying her to talk to me. That would be great, because I have no clue how to talk to her. Yes, my social skills are less than desirable, the daughter of an ambassador that has no social skills. That is surely one for the record books.

She gives me a slight smile as we walk into the cafeteria. "Maybe when you trust me, I'll tell you."

Well that could take a while. "Fair enough." I say giving her a slight nod.

Seems fair enough to me, she's right I don't trust her. Although so far she hasn't given me a reason to not trust her. I pass her a tray as we make our way down the line.

"What class do you have after this?"

"Criminology." You see I take a few classes here, I may not be sure what I want to do when I'm older, but I know I am taking the correct classes.

"Anything else?" she asks as she sits across from me.

"Linguistics and Youth Justice Studies." I sigh slightly.

"That's a big case load."

I chuckle slightly. "I guess, but I am able to manage it."

"You really struggle at this don't you?" she says.

I look at her for a moment unsure what she means.

"Talking to people." This time she is giving me a pointed look.

I can't help the sigh that leaves my lips. "Struggle is one way to put it." I close my eyes slightly.

"You're still waiting for me to hurt you?" I can hear the under tone in her voice.

"Sorry." I can't help looking away from her.

"Don't worry, I can understand."

Now I frown at her. "How can you understand?" I love asking dumb questions. No wonder she thinks me taking all these class is a big case load for me.

She shrugs slightly. "Looks don't get you anywhere in life Emily, they either get you in trouble because the wrong people want to be you friend, or you become a victim of torment. You see Emily we aren't that much different."

I look at her in awe, okay part of me is trying to work out if she is lying. "Not many people call me Emily." I say softly as I look at her. "Freak, loser." I close my eyes slightly. "And maybe just a few other names, which don't really matter."

Okay so maybe opening up to her like this could end with me being hurt again, but something about her makes me want to be honest with her. Well not completely honest with her.

"So, I'll see you next week?"

Okay now I'm confused. "Do you not have class on Friday?"

I watch as she smiles at me. "Just one day a week, it's all my boss can spare me for." She chuckles slightly. "I'll see you on Tuesday," she stops her hand rests on my shoulder. "I'll be here before class starts. I promise." I can only nod as she disappears out of the cafeteria.

* * *

The week seemed to drag, I was looking forward to Tuesday. I never thought in a million years I'd be looking forward to seeing someone. Again I am sat by the same fountain waiting to see if she truly dose turn up.

"This seat taken." For a second I didn't recognise the voice. I had to look up for a moment.

"What happened?" I couldn't help ask, totally ignoring the question.

She chuckled slightly as she took the seat next to me. "I got into a fight." She smirks. "He looks worse."

Okay now I'm slightly worried. "A man did this?" Okay I need to remember to keep my temper under control.

"I'm fine, the bruise will heal." She chuckles slightly. "If it makes you feel better I gave him a broken nose."

"A man shouldn't hit a woman." Yes, I said it in a firm tone.

"True, but like I said he came off worse."

"Have the police been informed?" I can see the trees starting to sway, the water starting to make a gurgling sound behind me. I must keep my temper under control, but I can't help it. Is this just friendship I am feeling?

She looks at me for a moment and I wonder if in that split second if she will tell me the truth.

"Sort of."

"What's that meant to mean?"

She chuckles. "He's out on bail. I'm fine Emily I promise."

"Okay." I close my eyes slightly as I suppress my anger.

Yes, maybe having these abilities isn't a good thing when you're angry. It is the one of the things my grandfather didn't show me how to control, it's something I need to learn on my own. That goes for a lot of things. My abilities seem to grow each year, and each year I have to find a way to control them. If anyone ever found out, they would hang me for sure.

"So you ready for class?" she asks me.

"Amy?" She's looking at me now waiting for me to speak. "Thank you."

Now she's frowning at me. "Why on earth are you thanking me?"

I smile slightly. "For keeping your word." I state.

"Told you Emily, I'm not out to hurt you. And I promise I'll never lie to you."

There it was the first promise. Maybe I take her at her word, but only time will tell.


	3. Chapter 3

The next six months had been the same, Amy would meet me at the fountain and we would sit together every class on a Tuesday, going for lunch straight after, although these days she seems to linger more after class and lunch. I often wonder if this is what it is what it is like to have a friend?

Then again I ask myself is it only friendship I want from her?

Tuesday seems to come around so fast these days; I find myself making my way over to our usual meeting place. But today is different, today would be one of those days, that the bullies would make themselves known. And all I can do is wait for it. In truth it had been building for months. Tension, coming off them in waves. Now don't get me wrong it isn't Amy's fault, but at the same time, it is because of Amy that these mean girls want to knock ten-bells out of me.

You see Amy never seems to notice them, as though she is looking through them. Her full focus on either the class or me. Now this is where I might want to point out. My social skills are still totally lacking, even after six months I still find engaging in conversation with her hard. Never the less, she doesn't even seem to notice, or she does, but she is just to kind to bring attention to it. I guess the one major break-through is that I am now starting to trust her more. That's something right?

"Oi, freak!" I can't help my shoulders slumping as I try to ignore the onset of this.

"I'm talking to you freak."

Believe me I could knock them all out, but then my secret would be on full view and I would be whisked away. To either be used as a lab-rat, or in an asylum. This is the reason I ignore them. Or try to at least.

"You think you're better than us."

Another girl hissed at me as one of them shoved me to the ground. And this would be why I find talking hard.

"Do you pay her?" I frown this time.

As my grandfather once told me if I rise to it, I am just as bad. I have to be the bigger person, and no this never brings my temper out. It remains me that no one could ever truly understand me. And there it is the first kick. I try and shield myself as much as I can, as their feet make contact with my body. It may hurt now, but the damage they are inflicting on me will be gone by tomorrow.

"I'm talking to you. She's isn't here to protect you."

The physical is never as bad as the mental side of things. Cuts and bruises heal. There is just no healing the mind. You're told something often enough it becomes true. I close my eyes as a foot makes contact to my lower back. God I feel sick.

Their voices mould into one as they call me names, telling me how much I am not wanted here. Do they not think I know this already? I close my eyes as tears start to form.

I feel anger? Not my anger.

"No one wants you here."

I heard that saying so much over the years I know they are right. Again I can feel a burning anger. One that is feral, that is full of hate and disgust.

"JUST WHAT THE HELL, DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!"

I've never heard someone shout like that, although I am grateful as the kicking finally subsides.

"Move away from her, right now. Before I make you move."

Okay maybe I should pay her? I mean, I can feel the fear now coming of these, mean, vile, nasty girls. As they back away from me. I can't look, I can't even cast my view her way. She will see me for what I am. A freak, weak, an outcast. I hear them scurry away and I am unsure what has made them flee so fast.

"Emily."

She's kneeling next to me now, her hand rests on my arm, as the other is placed on the floor. I catch a glimpse of her hand. And that's when I see it, that's when I know why they have fled so quickly. I jolt away from her slightly.

"I promise I am not going to hurt you." Her voice is so soft. But my eyes are now focused on the gun in her hand. "Emily. Look at me." There is such a firmness in her voice, I am compelled to look at her.

"Thank you." My voice is full of unshed tears, my body trembles slightly as she moves closer to me again.

"I won't hurt you." I watch as she clips her gun back to the side of her pants, which is cleverly hidden by her bag. "Come on we need to get you cleaned up."

"I'll be fine." Okay maybe if she knew me fully she'd accept that, but since she doesn't, I can only swallow and nod slightly.

"Still, I want to make sure they haven't done too much damage." I frown at her slightly as the tears slip from my eyes.

"I'm not going to judge you Emily."

I take a breath. Does she mean that? Does she truly mean that? Or is this the part where she pity's me?

"I'll be." I stop as she offers me her hand to help me up.

"Yeah fine, you said that once." There it is again that slight amusement in her voice.

I take the offered hand as she helps me to my feet. My legs are trembling. Did they really do that much damage? She steadies me wrapping her arm around my waist. I can't help the sharp intake of breath. For the first time in my life, I'm in pain!

"Can you just trust me enough to allow me check you over. If nothing more to make sure they haven't left shoe imprints on your back." There was a firmness to her voice now.

I can feel something off her for the first time. From the second my eyes fell on her, I have felt nothing. But in this second, I feel the worry, the pain. Is it because of what they have done to me that she is allowing her feelings to be shown?

"Does that happen a lot?"

I look at her for a moment as I try and supress my feelings. I nod. "Been a few months since my last."

She doesn't give me a chance to finish as her arms wrap around me tightly. I tense for a second. She pulls back looking at me, her fingers move the hair out of my eyes, I can't help flinching away slightly, but she doesn't seem to pull away when I do.

"Okay, well let's get you checked out first, and then we will deal with the rest."

Her voice holds so much authority that I double check it is Amy that is with me. "How do you mean deal?"

Can I just point out. I wouldn't need to ask such stupid questions if I could just hear her thoughts. But with her there is nothing, well aside from what I am feeling off her now, although I can't hear her thoughts.

"I mean; I am going to make them regret ever laying a hand on you." Okay there it is venom. The tone in her voice can do more damage than anything.

"I." I sigh slightly. "It'll just make it worse." I close my eyes slightly as I allow her to guide me down the corridor to where the restrooms were.

"How could it be possibly worse Emily? Five girls beating on you. Five girls hurting you."

I give her a slight smile. "Normally more." I look at her wide-eyed, before my eyes look towards the door. Damn it. I didn't mean to say that out loud.

"Pardon?" Why does her voice hold so much authority to it?

"I'll be okay," I give her a small smile. "I promise."

I close my eyes slightly as her fingers ghost down my back, I try to hide the flinch as her fingers make contact with where their boots hit.

"Lift your top up Emily." I swallow slightly. "Please." Her eyes seem to speak to me this time. I close my eyes as I lift the back of my blouse up. "My god." I hear her whisper. "This isn't okay."

"Told you, I'm a freak." This time my resolve breaks as I try and hold on to the sink.

"No you're not a freak. My sweet girl." There is a softness in her voice as she speaks.

I close my eyes to regain my composer "Thank you." I whisper as she wraps her arms around me. We stay like that for a while. I feel safe. For the first time in my life. I feel safe.

"What are you doing for the holidays?" she asks changing the subject as I pull away so I can wash the blood off my hands and remove the tear stains from my cheeks.

"Nothing," I pause. "Was just going to stay here and do some studying." I say honestly.

"Fancy coming away with me? Instead of being alone?" I shake my head slightly.

"I don't have any money." I let out as a whisper.

"Well I have a holiday home in Florida. So it won't cost you anything. Plus, I'd like to get to know you better, somewhere away from here. Somewhere neutral."

I frown slightly. "You have a job to go to." Yes, I state the obvious again.

"I do, and they also allow me to have time off, so I can go on vacation." There is a lightness in her voice as she speaks. "Unless you really want to stay here." I watch as she takes a breath. "I want to get to know you Emily. I want to know the real you."

God that smile.

"And besides I have a promise to keep." I look at her puzzled for a moment.

"Okay." I take a breath before I speak again. "I'd like that." She looks at me amused as though she is waiting for something else to be said.

"Maybe once we get back, your social skills will be slightly better." I can hear the laughter in her voice as she speaks. I blush slightly.

"You're not funny." I chuckle slightly.

"Made you smile though."

She says softly, although now she catches me completely off guard, her lips ghost along mine. I don't pull away instead I allow myself to lean in more. I allow her to pull me into a soft kiss.

"My sweet, sweet girl." I hear her whisper as she pulls back slightly.


	4. Chapter 4

The days all seemed to mingle into one, Tuesday would turn up so fast, and it would be over in the blink of an eye. Her touches had become more tender towards me. She has never brought up the fact that we have kissed and part of me wonders if it was a mistake.

"Hey." I can't help the smile that brightens up my face.

"Hey, how are you?" I ask, her hand rests into mine as she entwines our fingers. Maybe she doesn't bring it up, because she meant it? Have I totally missed something again?

"Does your brain ever rest." I hear her muse.

"Uh? When I'm asleep." I says as I gently tug at her hand.

"Well stop over analysing everything." I frown slightly as she chuckles. "You make the cutest of faces when your mind is racing."

Okay now I'm blushing as I look into her pale blue eyes. I half chuckle at the comment. "Thanks I think." She shakes her head at me before dragging me slightly towards the classroom.

"Have they left you alone?" I hear the concern in her voice as we sit down.

"Yes." Well they've left me alone physically, names calling, snide remarks every day. But I can't let her know that.

"Good." She pauses as she studies my face. "You would tell me if they did. Wouldn't you?"

"Promise." She gives me a slight nod as she places her books on the table.

"Thank you." Her hand reaches over to me as she gives it's a gentle squeeze.

The class seemed to drag today although I wasn't complaining about it, because I got to spend longer with Amy. Nothing else truly mattered, my grades were fine with all my classes. Which meant I was free to daydream about her. The only problem I have is, what if she finds out? Is that the point she will turn away from me? I don't know if I could deal if she walked away from me. She is the only other person I have ever had feelings for. The other person was my grandfather.

"So, shall I pick you up Saturday or Sunday?" I look at her slightly confused for a moment, I watch her demeanour change.

"Oh," I smile slightly. How on earth could I forget half term? "Whichever is best for you." I watch as she gets this cutest grin on her face, her eyes sparkle as she looks at me so intently.

"Well if I pick you up Saturday, we'll have more time together." She waits for me before we head out of class.

"Very true." I give a slight smile as we make our way to the cafeteria. I wait until we are sitting down. "Why do you carry a gun?" Okay granted I should have asked her that, the day she found those girls beating on me, but to be honest, it totally slipped my mind.

She smiles as me, "Does it worry you?" she asks me.

"No, just curious." I laugh as I bat her hand away from my fries.

"Good." She titles her head slightly.

"That isn't an answer." I point out.

"No, but like I said to you before, once you fully trust me I will tell you. All you need to know for now is I won't harm you."

There it is again, she says it a lot to me, do my eyes give so much away? Are they speaking to her without me knowing? Am I transparent to her? Do I take it at face value or do I push her slightly?

"I do trust you." I frown slightly.

"True, but not fully."

Okay good point, but that also isn't the point. I scratch my head slightly. "I'm starting to." I finally admit.

"I know and maybe when you do trust me fully, you'll stop hiding from me."

I shake my head slightly. How does she do that?

"Maybe." She gives me a slight nod as she manages to grab some of the fries off my plate. "If you wanted fries, why didn't you ask for them." I say in a laugh. Before reaching over and pinching the tomatoes off her plate.

"For the same reason you don't get those." She jokes back at me slightly. "And besides someone else's fries always taste so much better.

"Smooth." I say in a teasing manner. "How long will it take to get there on Saturday?"

"A day, if we are lucky." I nod slightly. "You're a bad traveller?" I can hear the concern in her voice as she speaks.

"Not so much a bad traveller, just sometimes I get motion sickness." I admit.

"I'll make sure I pick some medication up from the shop when I go. You'll need a good sunblock so you don't burn."

"Trying to say I look pale?" I say in a laugh.

"Not trying, just stating a fact." Okay I know she is older than me but sometimes she acts like a teenager. Although I am just as bad as I sick my tongue back out at her. "Can I ask you something?" I can hear the serious tone in her voice as I nod.

"Sure." I swallow slightly as I watch her straighten up as she looks at me.

"Why do you never fight back."

I sigh slightly. "I did fight back." I pause slightly. "Once." I shake my head slightly. "I put him in hospital." I state although I close my eyes as I take a deep breath. "I let my temper get the better of me." I pause as I look at her. "I didn't hold back, he spent a month in intensive care."

"What did he do?" now I can feel the worry in her voice as she speaks.

"It doesn't matter." I state. "I promised my grandfather I would never do it again." I smile slightly. "He told me to never lower myself to their standards again. I have to be the bigger person and not rise to it."

"There's a difference between being the bigger person, and becoming a victim." She looks at me with such emotion.

"I'm not a victim." I state.

She tilts her head at me. "Yeah, you are Emily, you're a victim of bulling."

"What does it matter, if I'm a victim. I heal, I don't give them the satisfaction of." I pause slightly. Was she right? Am I a victim?

"Calm down." She whispers to me. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"You get use to it after a while." I close my eyes as I try to calm myself. "I don't want your pity Amy."

"It's not pity Emily, it's concern. I'm only here one day during the week. You have to live here."

"Amy," I sigh slightly. "I've done alright so far." I smile slightly. "Please trust me?"

I watch her shoulder slump slightly. "I trust you Emily. Those girls on the other hand, are a completely different matter." I laugh slightly.

"I know, but without trying to sound corny and weird." I stop slightly as I try and figure out how to say it.

"Corny and weird?" she pushes me slightly.

"I can take anything they throw at me Amy, because I know." I swallow slightly as I pull my hand away from hers.

She nods slightly in understanding. "Okay," I frown slightly. "Fancy walking me to my car this time?" she teases, as we place our trays on top of the bin.

She takes my hand in hers as we make the short walk to the carpark. I stand in front of her as she leans against the black SUV. "Nice car." I say as I eye it up.

Although my eyes also wash over her body, I try and suppress the feelings I have inside, but when she is there all I want to do is wrap my arms around her and kiss her, just like she kissed me those few weeks ago.

"It's okay, but it gets me from A to B so it's not too bad." I nod slightly.

"Stay safe." I let out in a whisper, her hand reaches up towards my chin and I can't help the slight flinch as her hand cups my face so gently.

"I will." I nod slightly against her hand; she rests her forehead against mine. "My sweet girl." She whispers before her lips rest on my forehead. "I'll see you Saturday, usual place." She smiles slightly. "And if you want, I can help you pack since I have a better idea what Florida is like, than you." She gives me a pointed look.

"Okay," I pause slightly. "What time Saturday?" I ask as she gets into her car.

"Say nine?" I give her a slight nod.

"Nine it is." I smile as she closes the car door. I stand there for a while as I watch her car leave the parking lot.

* * *

The week seemed to drag, as though each hour would go forward only to reset its self again. You know what they say, a watched clock never moves. Well I now agree with that statement. My roommate had left early evening, leaving me alone. For the first time since starting here I was alone. The true reason why I wanted to stay on campus while everyone was gone is simple. I get to flex my gifts, I give in to the urge, I allow myself to truly feel what is around me. The humming of the birds, the running of water. I fully feel the air brushing against my skin. In that moment, in that second I am free. Truly free. No eyes on me, no snide remarks. No danger of anyone seeing me, seeing the real me. I get to control everything around me. The beauty of nature, the peacefulness that the night sky brings.

I didn't sleep Friday and I am sat here at our usual meeting spot. Although I worry now as it is nine-thirty and she is still not here. I close my eyes as I flex my mind, seeing if I can feel any movement on the ground, the faintest of footfalls. The low hum of a vehicle. Nothing. Maybe she changed her mind. I can't help the disappointment I am beginning to feel, the raw emotion I was allowing myself to feel. I was getting so lost in myself, so lost in my mind. I never heard her.

"Emily." I look at her blankly for a moment. "I am so sorry I am late." I blink slightly so I can focus on her.

"Is everything okay?" I ask, although this time I don't reach for her hand, I hold back there is something different about her right now, and I am unsure what it is.

I hear her sigh. "Yes, so are you ready to get packed up?" I frown at her slightly. "I promise everything is okay. So stop worrying."

Still I keep a slight distance from her. I will admit I don't exactly mean to pull away from her but somethings not right. I can feel it; I can sense it. "It's this way." Her hand wraps around my wrist as she pulls me towards her.

"I got hurt at work that's all, so can you please stop worrying." She whispers in my ear.

"How do you do that?" yep maybe I should have asked her the other times as well.

"Do what?" I can see the smug grin that is ghosting her lips.

"You always seem to know what I am thinking, or feeling." I say as I finally look at her properly.

"I pay attention."

She states it as though those three words say everything, yet they explain nothing.

I hear her sigh. "I don't know why Emily, I just do." I hear her take a deep breath. "You're special."

I frown at her. "Pardon?" Okay she is blushing, not just a slight blush, her cheeks have turned a deep shade of red and she has almost become shy.

"Can we," I watch her close her eyes slightly. "I care about you." It comes out as more of a whisper.

"Okay." I swallow slightly. I stop outside my dorm room.

I watch her face as she scans the room, one side of the dorm was littered with pictures, make-up, clothes thrown over the back of the chair, the desk littered with everything, just not school books or work. Then I watch as her eyes settle on the other side of the room. Neat, tidy and clean.

"How on earth do you manage to be so clean when you have to look at that?" I can hear her muse slightly.

"I try not to pay attention to it." I say with a slight chuckle. "I don't have much." I mumble as I open the cupboard door. She scans through the cupboard her hands touching everything I own.

"Do you only have black pants? And black jeans?" I can hear the amusement in her voice as she speaks.

"I like black." I smirk at her slightly.

"Would you wear any other colour, if I bought them for you?" I watch again as she becomes shy around me.

"Depends."

"On what?" she frowns at me slightly.

"Why would you want to buy me clothes?" Okay so to an outsider it may sound so stupid me asking that. Yes, I know dumb question. Isn't exactly the first dumb question I've asked her before now.

"Because I want to." Just a simple statement.

"Maybe." This time I can't help the smile at graces my lips. "Although," I sigh slightly. "I can't repay you. Not now anyway."

Yeah my mother controls my money. I wish I was twenty-five then she would have no control and I would have my own money. Not just the amount she deems acceptable. Two hundred dollars a month. I wouldn't mind but it's not even her money. It's what my grandfather left me, when he died.

"I didn't ask you to pay me back." Her arms snake around me and I lean so easily into her. "Can I ask you something?" he chin rests in the grove between my neck and shoulder.

"You can ask me anything." I say as I wrap my fingers around hers, leaning into her solid form.

I can feel the emotions her body is going through, her skin is trembling, so slightly, but I can feel it. "What's wrong Amy?" I ask, she lifts her chin off my shoulder which gives me enough room to turn around since her arms are wrapped around me still.

I hear her swallow hard, her eyes look directly into mine, and I can see so much emotion swirling behind those eyes, there is a slight fear in them as well. I bring my hand up carefully allowing my fingers to gently run against her cheek. I smile at her slightly as I watch the power play she is having.

"Amy." She looks at me, her body screams as though she is ready to bolt out the door and never look back. "Ask me whenever you are ready. Don't push yourself." I say softly. To which I gain a swift nod.

* * *

We had been travelling for the past four hours, and even though I gratefully took the tablets she offered me, my stomach beings to turn. "Amy, can we stop somewhere, please." I mumble slightly as I try and hold back the vomit which is working its way up my throat

Her hand rests on my leg as she looks at me for a moment. "I'll pull over to the side. Do you want some water?" I can see the concern in her eyes as I shake my head slightly.

I don't think I have ever jumped out of a car so fast. One hand holding my hair back and the other resting at the back of the car. Not a pretty picture. I close my eyes slightly as her hand rests on my back.

"Have a sip of this Emily." Still her hand rubs my back as I gratefully take the bottle of water.

"Sorry."

I hear her chuckle. "No need, you already warned me, you weren't a good traveller, I have some mints in the glove box, they may help settle your stomach."

"Thanks." I rinse my mouth out slightly thankfully I had missed my boots.

I just felt sorry for the next person that stopped here. Or not stopped away from it. Yeah not a nice image I just put in my mind. I spent the rest of the journey with my eyes closed, in a hope that would help the sickness pass.

"Once we get there I was thinking we could go out for something to eat, since I have no food in the house, not been out here for a while." She pauses slightly as I open my eyes to look at her. "Don't worry about the cost." She makes a point of stating.

"Okay." Again I close my eyes, but this time I feel her hand resting on my leg, I can't help placing my hand over hers, my fingers gently tracing her knuckles. A few hours passed I hadn't even noticed Amy had turned the engine off until she spoke.

"We're here." I can hear the lightness in her voice.

"Wow." I let out in a gasp. "It's huge." I state slightly.

She shrugs at me, "Have to spend the money I earn on something."

"Beautiful." She looks at me for a moment.

"It's okay."

I laugh slightly. "All the same." I muse slightly. I can tell she is studying me as I pull my bag out the car, before pulling her suitcase out.

"Emily?" it comes out as a question I look at her, my eyes soften for a moment. "I." I find it amusing that someone who's voice is normally so firm and strong, is now stumbling over her words. "Would you."

I know where this is leading as I watch her shoulders slump slightly as she trips over the words so badly. "Would I what?" Okay so this maybe cruel, but I have no idea where this conversation is going. Although I know what I'm hoping for.

"I know I'm older than you." She pauses and it's in that split second I know what she is struggling to ask.

"You sure you want to ask the local freak out?" I give her a pointed look. Although now she is scowling at me and it makes me back away slightly.

"You are not a FREAK." Okay now I feel that anger again. "Damn it Emily, why do you listen to them?" she seems to be trying to calm herself down slightly. "You are stunning." She lets out in a whisper and I nearly miss it. "You need to stop listening to those people. They don't know you, they don't see how special you truly are." It comes out in such a rush that it leaves me lost for words.

"Amy." I look at her for a moment. "You're beautiful" I state before I look back down. "And I'd, if that's what you wanted, I'd love to go out with you." I pause slightly as I feel her wrapping my arms around her. I move my face slightly. "I need to brush my teeth." I state, she chuckles slightly.

"It's okay." She mumbles as she gently places her lips on my cheek. "Come on, let's get freshened up, I know just the place for something to eat, you'll love it."

* * *

I watch her for a moment, I hadn't realised just how truly stunning she was, until she stood there in front of me, with dark blue jeans and red and brown shirt on, high boots on so she was slightly taller than me.

"You look stunning." I say softly.

"Thanks, so do you like Italian food?"

"Yes, I lived in Italy for a while when I was in my mid-teens."

"So you have motion sickness and yet plane journeys are okay?" I could hear the teasing tone in her voice.

"Not always okay, hit turbulence and all bets are off." I chuckle.

* * *

The air is so humid here, my skin feels sticky and even the breeze does nothing to elevate it. I know I still struggle talking and she never seems to mind, comfortable silence. I can see she is watching me as we make our way down the sidewalk.

"Amy, can we go a different way?" I ask, I can feel something a head, evil, a menace. Not even five hundred yards away.

"It's just up here Emily," I look as she points to the corner of the street.

"Please." I try again.

I close my eyes slightly as I feel him getting closer, if only she knew. If only she knew why I was asking her to change direction, to find another way. We were walking straight into the lion's den and I couldn't stop it.

"Give me all your valuables and no one gets hurt" he slurred as he held the knife towards Amy.

He lunged forward slightly, and that was all it took, that wrong move made my temper boil, my blood began to warm my skin, I could feel my heart hammering against my chest, the anger taking over me. I couldn't control it.

"Emily STOP!"

I hear her yell, but I can't, I can't control myself. I move him with such force, pushing him up the wall the knife still tightly in his hand, I start to move his limbs. Wanting him to push that knife into his own skin.

"EMILY, PLEASE. STOP!"


	5. Chapter 5

"EMILY"

I hear her shouting at me, but I can't my anger is feral, it isn't just about him, its everything which is spilling and pouring out and on to him, I can hear him shouting, but nothing can alleviate this feeling. I manage to move the knife so it is resting against his neck, it would only take one finally push and it would be over for him.

"Don't make me do this Emily please."

I close my eyes slightly as I listen to her panicked voice. I try to clear my mind. I hear the familiar clicking of the safety being released off the gun.

"Put him down. Now." I swallow slightly.

If I carry on this path, I know what will happen. Can she not understand, he tried to hurt the woman that I love? Oh god. Is that why my temper is so out of control? Am I in love?

"Emily don't make me shoot you." Her voice is so low, so gentle. "Put him down gently."

I can only nod my head in reply as I finally get my anger under control. I watch him scurry away so fast, but now I have fear taking over my anger, wrapping it nasty hands around my neck.

"What are you?" I hear her ask.

The problem is I have no clue, I just have these powers that make me different. A freak. A demon. Maybe my parents were right. Maybe I don't belong in this world. I turn around, her gun is still trained on me. I can't help backing away from her.

"What are you?" Her voice is so firm.

"A freak." I finally let out in a whisper.

I can't help looking down as I back away more, I don't think my mind could cope watching her shoot me. Maybe I am an animal. Maybe I do need putting down. Isn't the first time I have wanted or felt like dying. Wanting someone to put me out of my misery. I often wonder why my parents didn't oust me. Maybe Amy will. Maybe this is the point where I say goodbye.

"I'll go." I mumble as I sense the gun being lowered the safety being clicked back into place.

"Emily." I shake my head slightly. "Don't go." I frown this time, but still I can't bear to look at her.

"Why? So you can call the police on me." In this moment I don't trust her. I don't trust her to not unclick the safety off that gun and fire at me.

"I'm not going to call the police." I hear her sigh. "They wouldn't believe me anyway."

"So you thought about it." I mumble. She is just like everyone else I n my life. They find out they chastise me, they turned on me. Maybe the only one person to truly care for me, and he is no longer here.

"You had a knife to his throat Emily, what do you expect me to think?" I knew letting her close would probably be for the worst and I think the point is being proven.

"You were about to kill him." Okay so maybe she's right maybe I was.

"He pulled a knife on you." I state.

"I know."

"He lunged it at you." Yes, I know stating the obvious.

"Look at me Emily, please?"

I shake my head slightly; I don't trust myself. My fight or flight mode is building deep inside me and I know if I try and fight, it wouldn't end well for her. "I'll be out of here by tonight, you won't ever see me again." I can't help the tears which are forming, or the fact my voice sounds so weak as I try and control myself more.

"I knew."

"What do you mean you knew?"

"The few times you've been angry, I saw things move, I just didn't believe it, until now."

"You're lying." This time I look at her, I notice she has put her gun away.

"Let's go back to mine and we can talk." Her hand reaches out towards me. But for the first time since she spoke to me at college, from the first time she offered me friendship. I don't reach back. "I trust you Emily."

I close my eyes slightly. The problem is I don't trust her. I could be walking into a trap. My body is tingling with all these different feelings, I feel the tremors on my skin, my body dropping temperature. The colour draining from my skin. She moves closer. Which only makes me back away more from her.

"Please Emily, don't run from me."

There is a type of plea in her voice. But my senses are screaming at me to run and never look back. I can fix my heart in time, I can block her out of my mind in time, make it so I don't know who she is. If only I could see in her mind, I'd be able to do what I've done before. I made Mark and John forget who I was, including their family, in their minds they've never met me. They don't and won't know who Emily Prentiss is. They guy I nearly killed when I was fifteen doesn't remember who I am, he thinks he was in a car crash, and everyone believed him, since his injures mirrored a car crash victim.

"Emily, say something. Anything."

I hadn't realised I hadn't spoken or that I was becoming lost in myself again, revaluating everything in my life, she's always going to know. Her mind is like a fortress, no weak points. I can't manipulate her mind. I can't make her feel or think anything else, because there's nothing there.

"I..."

There are no words I can use. I just look at her before I bolt down the alleyway. I know she hasn't followed me. I need to get away from here. I need to find my way back home. She can't hurt me then; she can't pull me into a trap. I wonder how much money she'd get for something like me? Will there be a price on my head in the morning? Will my picture be plastered all over the city? Or all over the country. I wish I could go home. But the problem I have is. I don't have a home. I have a dorm room on campus, and that's it.

God what am I meant to do? I finally stop running, I manage to lean against a wall before my body crumbles to the ground. The tears that had been welling deep inside me rip out from my chest as I sob uncontrollably. In the space of an hour. I gained a girlfriend, and then lost her. Surely another record I just broke. My heart hurts. Not just a feeling but it physically hurts. I can feel it knotting in my chest, as my breath becomes slow as the tears subside. Why do I feel like I've lost everything?

It feels like the day I lost my grandfather. But only this time I caused this. If I hadn't of let my temper control me, none of this would have happened and she wouldn't know my secret. Although at least she knows why I am a freak. Why the girls beat on me. Does this mean she'll now turn into one of these nasty girls? Do I need to protect myself from her? What am I meant to do? I have no one I can turn to. No one to give me advice anymore.

How does she except me to trust her when she pulled a gun on me. Yes, granted I was about to kill someone. But I was protecting her. I was protecting her from being hurt. He didn't care about her, he didn't care if he hurt her, he didn't even care if he hurt me. Maybe I am better off alone. I only have one slight problem now. Is how do I get back to college.

I shouldn't have come here with her. I shouldn't have allowed my guard down. I shouldn't have become her friend.

Maybe I'd be better off dead?

I think that is one of the better thoughts I've had. Make everyone's wish come true.


	6. Chapter 6

I need to ground myself, I need to wipe all these emotions away from me, away from my mind. Away from my heart. I need the peace that night truly brings. There has to be a harbour or a pier, around here somewhere. If I can just get to the sea. If I can get to it, maybe I can calm myself.

I seem to be walking for hours, as I finally find a sign stating the way to the beach. I look at my watch it has been two and a half hours, since Amy pulled her gun on me, two and a half hours since I nearly killed someone. And I still have all these feeling swirling inside me. I feel everything, the looks I'm getting of people. But right now I can't block their thoughts, and it hurts so much. I can't differentiate the feelings. Because I am feeling them as well. Their emotions are mixing with mine; I can feel my so called gifts starting to raise their ugly heads. I never thought I'd hate myself as much as I do right now.

I wonder what she is doing right now. Phoning the local police? Trying to sell the story of a freak to the local press? Contacting the underground black market? See how much she could get for me? Or maybe she is letting the nsa, know they have a breach of security. Or maybe she thinks I'm an alien. I can just picture myself being carted away. Maybe they will take me to area fifty-one. Maybe I'm over reacting to this situation? But I've never been in a situation like this.

I don't know how I ended up where I'm now stood, but finally the voices have stopped I am far enough away from them. The water is so calm. But still I am like a volcano waiting to erupt. I can't help the sigh that escapes my lips, I climb on top of the metal barrier, maybe it's more of a ledge since I have enough room to perch on it.

I watch as the waves crash gently in the wooden poles beneath me. I also at that point wonder how far up I truly am. Doesn't matter really. I breathe in the sea breeze, the saltiness that the water offers sends chills down my spine. If I don't flex my gifts now, they will become too strong for me to hold them back. Talk about Jekyll and Hyde. Calm on the outside, and a storm raging on the inside.

I look out concentrating on the furthest part that my mind can stretch, my mind swims as though it is making a whirlpool in the ocean, the moon acts as a shield to the waves, I bring the whirlpool up turning it in to a water twister. This would be too dangerous on land, but at sea there is no one around. The fish have long since moved on after they felt the undercurrent becoming unstable. I allow my feelings to pour into the twister, the speed and height all at my control.

"Beautiful"

The voice makes me jump, breaking my concentration for a second.

"Don't stop."

I swallow slightly, I can't leave this I have to control it, or it will set off something worst that I won't be able to control. I close my eyes as I stop my mind from swirling, I watch as the ocean becomes calm again.

"Don't run from me Emily." My shoulders slump. "I've told you so many times I'm not going to hurt you and I mean it."

I shake my head slightly. "Then what do you want from me? You knew." I sigh slightly.

"I'm not going to tell anyone."

I scoff slightly. "You already thought about telling someone Amy. Like you said, they wouldn't believe you. So why should I believe you now?" Part of my wants to jump off this pier and into the ocean. Allowing the water to take me.

"You were going to kill him Emily. I can't just let you kill someone and pretend it didn't happen."

"I would have stopped before I killed him." My voice lacks any emotion now, and I find myself asking if I would have stopped. Would I truly have stopped once I made him draw blood?

"Didn't look like you were going to stop to me." I hear the sigh leave her lips. "Please Emily."

"What do you want me to do?" I ask as tears form in my eyes.

"I want you to come back over here so we can talk." I half chuckle.

"I'm fine right here." I state.

"Maybe you are, and maybe you're just waiting for me to give you a reason to jump."

I close my eyes. "I don't know how to do this Amy." I bring my hand up to wipe the tears away.

"What talk to me?"

I nod. "Why did you come looking for me, unless you have brought the police with you and you're just waiting so you can slap the cuffs on me."

"Emily, if you turn around you will see I am on my own. I know you don't trust me. And I know the trust you had started to have in me, has gone. But you have to give me a chance to prove I'm not going to turn on you."

"I've heard that before Amy. You will in time. Just like the others."

"I can't talk to you like this Emily, you're sat a hundred feet above the water, it will only take one wrong move and I will lose you."

I frown slightly. "I'm not going to jump." I state slightly, all thought the thought had crossed my mind.

"Maybe not, but I know if it was me I'd be thinking it." I shrug slightly. "I can't leave you here Emily."

"I thought things were too good to be true. Is this all to get close to me, so you can sell me off."

"Emily, I would never do that. Why on earth would you think that. What reason have I given you to make you even think that."

Okay I feel that anger again although I also feel the hurt. "You're too perfect." I whisper slightly.

"I'm far from perfect Emily. I have made so many mistakes in the past, don't let this add to the list." I turn to look at her this time. "I don't want to lose you Emily. And if you are worry about me telling anyone."

"You can't make that promise Amy, if it came to it. You would."

"No, maybe if you could trust me, you'd know my word is good enough."

I take a breath as I swing my legs around so I can look at her, granted I am still perched on the ledge but I don't trust her, she won't try and grab me from here.

"Have I given you a reason not to trust me?"

I laugh slightly. "You pulled a gun on me."

"You had him dangling in the air Emily what was I meant to do? Clap?" I can hear the mocking tone in her voice now.

"You still kept it on me once I let him go." I point out. I watch as her shoulders slump her eyes break contact with mine as she looks to the ground. "You thought I was going to turn on you?" I ask.

"I didn't know what you were going to do Emily. You haven't let me in close enough to see the real you. How am I meant to act? You go from nearly killing someone, to your full attention turning on me."

"I'd never hurt you."

I look away now, I turn to dangle my legs back over the other side, above the water. I don't need her to see my emotions. The waves start to crash against the wood, the gentleness and calm has gone. My emotions taking control of my environment again.

"How do I know that you wouldn't turn your anger at me?"

I shake my head. "Do you really think I'd have done that to him, if he wasn't trying to hurt you Amy. He didn't care, he didn't care if he killed you. Was I meant to just stand there and let him rob us? Let him hurt you with his knife. Because I can tell you now Amy. He was going to kill you." I close my eyes slightly as I feel the water current become stronger.

"How do you know that Emily?"

I scoff slightly at her. "For the same reason I asked us to go a different way."

"You heard him?"

"Maybe." I can't tell her everything. She's just going to turn on me.

"Emily. How am I meant to get your trust? What do I need to do to prove am not going to turn against you? That I'm not going to trap you and have you whisked away. How am I meant to prove that if you don't give me a chance?"

Maybe she has a point, but I am so lost. I've never been in a situation like this.

"You have to trust someone at some point Emily."

"I told you, I'm a freak, a problem, a demon." I know I'm mocking myself but it's true.

"You're special. You're not a freak, a demon and you are not a problem." I hear her sigh. "You are none of those things to me. You are someone I care greatly about; someone I want in my life."

"I never understood why you wanted to be my friend in the first place." I whisper slightly. "I thought it was a cruel trick the girls were playing on me." I shake my head slightly. "I thought you took pity on me Amy. And then after the first few months I started to believe you truly wanted to be around me. I know I find talking hard but I." I stop slightly.

"I can understand why you find it hard Emily. Can we please go somewhere else and talk about this? I'm in the car. Please?"

"How did you find me?" I hear her sigh, and I also hear footfall as she backs away slightly.

"If I promise to tell you everything would you please just come with me, back to my home. Just give me a chance."

"I need to calm down Amy. Just please." I don't know how to ask her to leave without sounding like I don't want to give her a chance.

"Florida really doesn't need a tidal wave right now." I hear her whisper.

I nod. "I just need to get my emotions under control." I close my eyes as I take a breath. "Please."

"I'll be at the end of the pier take your time." I can only nod my response this time. I need to concentrate again to calm the ocean, to calm the waves that have become as rough and raw as my emotions.

 


	7. Chapter 7

I have so many questions for her, but then I wonder how many she has for me, the waves have calm down, although my thoughts are still muddled, my emotion are still swirling inside me, I close my eyes one last time as I look across the ocean.

The drive back to her house was quiet, I could feel the tension coming off Amy, it was a mix of everything. Worry, fear and panic.

"I won't hurt you Amy." I say softly.

I hear her sigh slightly; her hand reaches over to mine as she gently places it on my leg.

"I know." Her voice is so low, a soft whisper.

Is the world around me going to come crashing down? It seems she's been driving ages, had I really walked that far? Or is she biding her time. It has taken just over twenty minutes to arrive at her home.

"Are you okay to come inside with me?" her voice has lost the firmness to it, it almost sounds weak, as though she is waiting for me to do something to her. "I promise, no one is here aside from us."

I nod, I don't sense anyone else, I can't hear or feel anyone else's presence here, no movement, just the peacefulness that night brings.

"I believe you." I state. Yeah, my trust in her has gone, everything has no evaporated in to thin air. Aside from my feelings for her. I can't switch those off and in all honesty I don't want to.

"Do you drink wine?"

"Yes, but only red wine."

"Red it is." I follow her into the kitchen.

"Are you scared of me?"

"No." A simple statement, one word that makes me relax slightly. "How did you know he was there Emily? How did you know he was going to hurt me, hurt us?"

"I could feel him." Okay not just feel him but right now I don't want to rush in telling her everything.

"Is that all?"

I sigh slightly. "No."

"Okay." She says as she hands me the glass, which is filled with a healthy amount of wine.

"How did you know?" I ask. I need to know before I tell her anymore. If she can be honest about that, then maybe I can try and trust her again.

"The first time I saw you become angry." I frown slightly, trying to remember. "When I had got into a fight with that guy."

"Men shouldn't hit women." I point out.

"True, but I noticed the angrier you became the more the water in the fountain moved."

I look away from her slightly. "Why didn't you say something?" I pause. "I mean after, when we. After we'd."

"Kissed?" Yep, fully grateful for her interruption. "You'd have run." Okay good point she has there. "And besides I honestly thought I was seeing things." I watch as she lets out a slight laugh. "Every time you become angry or slightly pissed off. Things move."

"Oh." My shoulders slump slightly. "I don't understand why you never told me?"

"Like I said to you the other day, I want to get to know the real you. And I was hoping this trip would help you trust me more. I didn't mean to keep my gun on you Emily, but you were so angry. I know what it's like to get so angry that you can't control the rage."

I look at her in shock. "You can feel me?" I can't help but move slightly.

"Not really Emily." She gives me a slight smile. "I can just read you, I see the beauty in you, I pay attention to the small things, the things that people don't notice. The way you pick at your nails when you are stressed. The way you try and hide behind the walls that you have built so high around you heart. I see the pain swirling in your beautiful chocolate eyes. I see you Emily. I feel your eyes washing over my body, when you think I'm not looking. I don't know why I feel you like that Emily. But I also know it's a good thing."

"I.." do I take a chance?

"You haven't lost me Emily. Although I worry I've lost you."

"How did you find me?" she lets out a half chuckle.

"You know when you asked me what my job was, I work for the government." She holds her hands up slightly. "Don't let that frighten you Emily, please." I can't help the tension that now settles around me. "I asked a friend to hack into the security cameras."

"Why would you do something like that? How did you explain that?"

"I was honest with her, my girlfriend had run off, in a city she doesn't know, far away from her home. And I was worried for your safety." She looks at me her hand reaches over to mine, although this time I don't pull away. "If anything happened to you Emily, I'd never forgive myself."

"You promise?" She has always kept her promises to me, and I can tell she is being honest with me, her skin is trembling slightly, I entwine out fingers.

"I promise; I promise you Emily I would never betray you. Not like that, and not to them, not to anyone. I need you in my life Emily. Nothing else truly matters." She lifts my hand up as she placed her lips on my knuckles. "My sweet girl."

I can't help the blush that covers my cheeks. "I heard him. I could hear his thoughts." Now she is scowling at me.

"Does that mean you hear mine?" I shake my head.

"For some reason I don't feel you, or hear what is going on in your mind. I can sense you. But at the same time I like it, i like not being able to hear you. It's like you are blocking me out. There are no weak points. As though you have a shield covering you. But yet I can feel your skin tremor, the beating of your heart. The only time I felt any type of feelings off you were, when those girls were beating on me."

"I was angry." She gives me a slight smile. "How did you manage to do that, at the harbour. It was beautiful." She pauses, "You didn't hurt anything doing that did you?"

I chuckle slightly. "Nothing was hurt, I had to let my feelings out. I just needed to calm myself."

"I watched you this morning, you know."

"Okay?"

"The trees were swaying, the fountain was becoming full of ripples as though the wind was blowing hard. Yet I felt nothing other than the heat from the sun." she pauses as she looks at me. "I told you, you're special, and I meant it."

"Do you know you're blocking me?" It puzzles me. Never come across someone that can shield their mind from me. Completely blocking me out, but yet her body language tells me she wants me.

I watch as she bites her lower lip, the battle she is having inside. "Yes."

"Why?"

"I don't mean to do it Emily. I don't even know how I do it. It just happens." She sighs slightly. "Maybe it's because I feel so deeply about you Emily." I watch as she starts to become shy.

"What is it Amy?"

"Do you believe in love at first sight?"

"Maybe." I pause taking a breath. "But I'm also not sure what love is."

She chuckles slightly. "Love is all those little moments, all those things that don't matter to anyone else, the look in your eyes, as you though you are looking at something so pure, so innocent. Someone that heals your pain without them knowing, something that brightness up your day, when all you want to do is cry. Love gives you a reason to carry on. Love is all those little things. It makes smile, when your world is crashing down around you, it's being able to sit in silence and still being able to hear you. It looking at you and feeling complete. Feeling whole."

"You love me?" Love never works out the way you plan it. Look at my family. Well aside from my grandfather.

"From the second you walked in that classroom and sat next to me. I could never hurt you Emily, because it would mean hurting myself." She pauses. "I'm not asking you to love me Emily, but I am asking for you to allow me to love you. Allow me to show you that not everyone in this world is out to hurt you. Let me show how much I care. Just give me a chance please."

I can't help the tears that well deep inside, I watch as she gently cups my chin making me look at her. Her pale blue eyes are swirling as though they are speaking to me. Again our lips meet. Maybe I can trust her? Maybe, just maybe she is worth it.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those waiting on updates on Sweet Revenge and The art of manipulation. I am working on it, but having to redo the last chapters I posted as I've found errors. And I split a chapter up by accident. So please bare with me.


	8. Chapter 8

We seem to be sitting in silence for ages her eyes studying me as her fingers trace over mine. "Shall I order us some food."

"Sounds good to me." I stop for a second as I look at her. "Amy?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

I sigh slightly as I take hold of her hand. "For running away from you, for not giving you a chance. For thinking you were like everyone else in my life." I lift my hand to wipe the tears that are now rolling down my cheek.

"You were scared Emily, and there's nothing wrong with being scared." I watch as she pulls her cell phone out. "Thank you for giving me a chance, I know how hard it must have been for you." She cups my cheek wiping the tears away. "Pizza sound good?" she smiles at me slightly as I nod. "Then maybe we can carry on this conversation. Unless it's too much for you?"

I look at her as I allow my eyes to close. "No one has ever wanted to know the real me. Other than my grandfather."

"You're parents?" I can't help but scoff slightly.

"They wish I was dead."

"My god Emily." I hear her whisper. "Let me place this order sweetheart, okay." I nod slightly, she moves to walk into the kitchen, I can hear the rustling of paper, but for some reason it doesn't unsettle me. "Do you like barbeque meat feast?" I hear her ask as she holds up the well-used menu.

"Yes, could I have a garlic bread as well. Please?" I watch as she nods. I find it amusing that she seems to pace as she waits for the phone to be answered. It didn't seem to take her long to place the order, I watch slightly amused as she walks back in carrying the already open bottle of wine and a full unopened on.

"You planning on getting me drunk?" I ask, as I eye her up and down.

"Nope, just after everything earlier I need a drink. Not every day I have a knife pulled out on me." She says giving me a pointed look. "Although seeing a guy hanging in mid-air is also a first for me as well." She says in a laugh.

"Someone wants you?" I muse as I hear her phone go off.

"I won't be a second." She moves again although this time she moves into the kitchen. "Hey Sarah." I can hear the lightness in her voice. "Yes I found her, she's home safe with me now. No I promise she is fine." I hear her grown. "Well how would you react having a knife pulled out on you?" I can hear the frustration in her voice as she speaks. "No Sarah," I hear her sigh heavily, why am I finding this so amusing? "No. Well not yet anyway." I watch as she shakes her head pinching the bridge of her nose as she starts to pace. "Because I said so, just please. You tell the team, and I will kill you Sarah. I mean it." I can hear the warning in her voice as she speaks and I am now wondering if she means that. "I'll see you when I get back, loves ya to kiddo."

"Everything okay?" I watch her nod.

"Yes that was just Sarah asking if I found you." She pauses slightly. "Did you hear her?"

"No, too busy watching you get flustered." I say as I try to hold a laugh back. "What do you mean by team?" I ask.

"I work alongside some people and we are classed as a team. I promise you Emily everything you tell me is safe." She pauses slightly. "And Sarah is just so nosey, she wants to meet you." I watch as she shakes her head slightly. "That woman is and will drive me insane one of these days. But she is harmless."

"You threatened to kill her." I say giving her a pointed look.

"I did and I sort of meant it. My team is my family Emily; we look out for each other. So she wants me to drag you to our family get together next month." She holds her hands up at me slightly. "Trust me, I wouldn't want to put that on you. Maybe in time but as for now. I want this just."

"You don't need to explain." I say softly as I watch her struggle with her words. "Normally me that gets tongue tied." I tease slightly.

"You seem relaxed?" She says in a type of a question.

The thing is I am relaxed and I am unsure why I have now become so settled is it because she knows my secret and still she wants me in her life? Or is it because I know she loves me?

"I am; you've never lied to me Amy. You've never broken your word." I pause. "And I want to trust you."

I watch her smile. "I want you to trust me Emily." I can see the cogs turning behind her eyes. "So you can hear and feel people. You also seem to be able to move things. Can you do anything else?"

I close my eyes. "Yes." I take a deep breath, trying to figure out how to tell her everything, and if I should? "I can feel people's emotions; I can hear their thoughts as though they are talking to me. Not always a good thing as I normally end up with a headache. Never learnt how to block them fully."

"You can block them?" I smile slightly.

"Never had to explain this before Amy so I'm trying." I sigh slightly. "My grandfather taught me how to control my gifts, but before he taught me how to block the voices he died." I swallow slightly. "I was sent back to my parents' home."

"He loved you."

I laugh slightly. "Yes, he never judged me, he never saw me as a problem, or a freak. He saw me. He was there for me when I had no one. He was my world. Then he died and I was sent back to live with them."

"Do you do that often with water?" I chuckle slightly.

"Water calms me. Just something about the peacefulness of the waves."

"They didn't look peaceful before." Her voice holds a slight teasing tone to it.

"I lose control when I get angry and scared, when I can't control my emotions. I can't control myself. It's like drowning with no water."

"So your emotions control your gifts."

I nod, "Your emotions hold you together, when one gets disjointed, you become disjointed. As you have seen"

"Would you show me that again?" I frown slightly.

"Show you what?"

"That whirlpool, it was beautiful."

"Never thought I'd hear someone saying a water twister was beautiful." I laugh slightly. "Maybe, one day. I should say night. Too dangerous during the day."

"No rush, I have forever to get to know the real you." I blush deeply as she speaks.

"I think I do know what love at first sight feels like." I say softly.

All my fear has left me. I feel calm and safe with her.

"What do you think it feels like?"

I take a deep breath as I look at her. "I think it feels like you." Her arms wrap around me tightly as she pulls me into a soft kiss.

"My sweet, sweet girl." I hear her whisper as her head rests against mine. "One day at a time sweetheart. Step by step." I swallow hard as her fingers ghost along my cheek. "Baby steps," she says as her finger traces my lip. "You need to trust me fully first sweetheart. And maybe when you do, you will share the rest."

There was no malice in her voice as she spoke.

* * *

It has been six months since me and Amy became an item, six months and I trust her more and more each day. The mean girls have found someone else to torment these days, although I feel sorry for their latest target, but I am also relieved. Maybe Amy will stop worrying so much now. We still only see each other on a Tuesday, only sometimes at the weekend due to her work load. I don't fully know what she does still, aside from working for the government.

I have found that her so called team are pressuring her for them to meet me. I am just not sure if I am ready for that. For the onslaught of their minds, I still struggle blocking people's thoughts and most days I walk around with a headache.

"Hey sweetheart." Her hand rests gently on my shoulder as she takes a seat next to me. "Everything okay?"

"As far as I know." Yes, my social skills are getting somewhat better now as well, much to Amy's relief.

"So you break in a few weeks for the summer, what do you plan on doing? Are you going back to stay with your mother?"

I can't help tensing slightly as she rests her hand on my shoulder. "Not sure yet." I say softly. "Not sure if she wants me there." I admit as my shoulders slump slightly.

"You could always stay with me." I watch as she bites her lower lip. "And I have some vacation days I need to take, so I can arrange to be off, maybe go back down to Florida?"

I chuckle slightly. "You sure you want me at yours? What will happen when you go to work though?"

I frown slightly as she shrugs. "I'm sure, and I am sure you can be trusted on your own at mine. Besides I'd like to spend some more time with you, away from here. Just us."

"And what about your team?" I ask. "You said you normally had cook outs at yours in the summer." I point out slightly.

"I do, normally. But I think they can cope one summer without me." She jokes. "What do you think about going back to Florida?"

"Sounds like a plan. On one condition" I say seriously.

"What's the condition?" Her eyes sparkle slightly as she looks at me.

"When I say can we go a different way; you'll go a different way." I chuckle as she lets out a laugh.

"With pleasure, I don't fancy having a knife pulled out on me again. Or the other." I watch as she tries to hold in the laughter that is building inside her.

"And maybe we can go to the pier and I can show you." Her arms wrap around me as she cuts me off slightly, as she pulls me into a soft kiss.

"I love you." I nod slightly as she blushes.

"We best get to class."

I know, still after all these months I can't bring myself to say those three little words. But at the same time, they aren't just three little words. They are powerful words, words that show how much you truly think of someone. It gives them the power to hurt you. And I am just not ready for that yet.


	9. Chapter 9

Why is it when you have something planned time drags? It was only three days ago Amy mentioned about staying with her during the summer break. Yet it feels like a month has passed, maybe if I study more the time will fly by? Something has to help other than watching the clock that never moves. I tick the days off on my calendar. The thing is, I know time is dragging now, and at the same time I know the time will fly when I am with Amy. Kind of sucks!

It seemed like months before Tuesday came around, I need to give her my answer, I kind of forgot that part last week. I close my eyes slightly as I sit at our usual spot. I can hear the soft footfalls of people, only every now and again do the footfalls seem to drag. It makes me laugh slightly, the athletic people and jocks seem to drag their feet. I wonder how many pairs of shoes they go through a month?

"Hey sweetheart." I can't help the grin at takes over my lips as I look up at her.

"Hey." Her fingers run gently through my hair and I gladly lean into her before she takes a seat. "Everything okay?"

"You mean aside from time dragging?" I muse slightly. "Everything is good here." I pause slightly. "I've been thinking."

"Should I be worried?" I shake my head slightly

"No, are you sure you'll be okay with my staying with you?" I cast a glance her way. "For the whole of the summer?" Her arms wrap around me tightly as she pulls me close.

"I was hoping you would say that." She says as she blushes deeply. "Why don't you leave your clothes here, and I'll buy you some fresh while you're at mine." I can hear the lightness in her voice.

I nod slightly. "One condition." I say as I look in to her. I could drown in those eyes; they are the bluest eyes I have ever seen.

"What's the condition?" I watch as she bites her lower lip.

"That you either allow me to pay you back, once I am able to." She holds her hand up slightly to stop me, I shake my head slightly. "Or you let me treat you to a holiday."

She sighs slightly. "Okay, I know I'm not going to win this." She says in a slight chuckle.

"You've done so much for me Amy. I don't like feeling like taking advantage of you." I sigh slightly. "I have the money, but my mother controls it, but once I am twenty-five I will have full control." I state.

"I don't see it as you are taking advantage of me, like I've said before, it's nice to be able to spend my money on things that aren't material, my car, and the two houses I own, don't truly mean anything to me. They just give me the security if anything happens and I am unable to work."

"Why do you think something may happen to you?" I give her a concerned look as she speaks.

"How about once we are away from here." She pauses, "I will tell you what my job is, who I work for and what I do." Her fingers entwine with mine. "Then we can take it from there." I can only nod my reply; she seems to have gone shy slightly as I tug at her hand.

"Sounds fair to me." I give her a slight smile.

* * *

The rest of the week seemed to fly by, Amy would be picking me up late Sunday as she had somethings to wrap up at work. She sounded tired on the phone when she called Late Friday. I don't think I have ever heard her sad, as though the wind had been kicked out of her. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and give her some comfort.

The knocking of my door made me jump slightly, I placed my book down as I made my way to the door. "My god Amy. What happened?" I ask as I motion her inside, I can't help my arms wrapping tightly around her.

Deep circles surrounded her eyes, she looked like she hadn't slept in a week, she didn't seem to even have the energy to wrap her arms around me, her head rested on my shoulder as I pulled her close. "What happed darling?" I whisper as I feel her lips on my neck. I could feel tears running down her checks as they wet my neck, her body trembling against me. I rubbed her back gently as I pulled her towards the bed. Some days I wish we were able to fit a sofa in the dorm room. It would make things so much easier.

"I've got you." I whisper as I manage to get us on the bed.

I could feel her breathing slowing down, as her heart slowed, she had cried herself to sleep, her head resting against my chest as my fingers trailed up and down her spine. I don't know when I fell asleep, but the early morning dawn chorus woke me, I couldn't help the slight flinch as I felt a soft hand resting against my bare torso. For a second I forgot Amy was with me. I pulled her closer to me, the warmth of her body I tried to close my eyes asleep hoping to get some more sleep, but her hand seemed to snake around my body causing me to tense slightly.

It hadn't fully registered where her other hand was until I felt her fingers ghost against the inside of my leg. Gently I took hold of her wrist. As much as I want to be with her I am not ready for that step, I'm not sure what would happen with my gifts if I was to down that path with her. I chuckle slightly as she grumbled her protest slightly, her other arm getting tighter against my waist. I placed a soft kiss on the top of her head.

"Morning darling." I said softly as I felt her nod against me.

"Sorry." I heard her mumble slightly.

"No need for sorry." My fingers gently run through her hair as she pulls me closer to her. "You feeling any better?" I asked softly. Her fingers started tracing against my stomach her nails slightly scratching my skin.

She shrugs slightly. "I'll be fine." I can't help shaking my head as I place my lips against her head.

"Just know I'm here for you." I whisper as she places a kiss on my chest.

"I know, sorry for falling asleep." She paused slightly. "Wasn't exactly my plan." She chuckled slightly.

"Not a problem, although you do have wandering hands in your sleep." I tease slightly.

"Oh god Emily. I am so so sorry." She said in a rushed breath.

"It's okay, stop worrying." I say softly. "If you let me up I'll go make us both a coffee."

I can feel her eyes tracking me as I walk to the far side of the room. "Thank you."

I frown as I look at her. "For what?"

"For being there for me." I give her a soft smile.

"Always will be." I pause, "Do you want to talk about it?" I ask as I finish the drinks off.

"Maybe later." She mumbles slightly.

"While you finish your coffee, I'm just going to go for a quick shower if that's okay?" I ask looking at her.

She nods at me. "Take your time, I'll have one once we get to mine." I hear her say.

"Okay I won't be long." And with that I head out the dorm room towards the shower rooms.

It didn't take long for me to take my shower and get dressed before heading back into my dorm room. "You didn't need to do that." I said softly as I watched Amy tiding around.

She chuckled slightly. "You best dry your hair before your clothes get soaked." She totally ignores my comment as she straightened up the bed.

I couldn't help noticing that she looked slightly fresher. Once I had finished drying my hair and I had packed up a few things that I needed. I placed a few books in my bag, she frowned slightly. "It helps keeping my mind off, and away from people's thoughts." I say to which I get a nod.

"How many pain killers do you need?" her eyes slightly wide as I place around six bottles in my bag.

"A lot." I state. "It takes the edge off. And before you start I am not addicted to them. I wish I didn't need them but sometimes my headaches get that bad I struggle to see straight."

"Okay, maybe we can find you something better to take. I don't like the idea of you using that many pills Emily, forget the fact that you may become addicted to them, it's what they are doing to your insides that concern me."

I smile at her, "Trust me, my insides are quite fine." I say softly.

"You going to tell me you can see your insides now?" I can hear the amusement in her voice as she speaks.

"No. I don't have x-ray vision" I say raising my eyebrow at her. "Some days I wish I did." I tease back, which earn me a slap.

"Behave."

"You brought it up." I say through a laugh.

"Right, you all set?" I nod slightly.

I can't help the nerves setting in as I lock the door behind me. I hadn't been to her home, the one thing that scared me was, we weren't hidden which meant, her work colleagues could turn up at any point. Which unsettled me slightly.

* * *

"You live here?" I question as I take in my surroundings.

"Yeah, it's not much but it's a roof over my head." She shrugs slightly.

"Not much? It's huge." I state.

"I guess, when the team come around though I wish it was bigger." She says through a laugh.

"They are okay with you, about missing out one of your cookout this year?" I ask, part of me feels guilty. She has chosen me over her friends.

"They are fine with it." She pauses slightly. "Emily this, you are more important than them right now." She blushes slightly. "They understand, yes they want to meet you. But I've told them you are painfully shy."

I raise my eyebrow out at. "I'm not that bad."

"You are." She says as she laughs slightly. "You get all flustered when you meet someone. It's cute."

"She flirted with me. In front of you." I point out.

"Still, it was funny."

"They won't just turn up will they?"

"No," I watch as she shakes her head slightly. "I've told them all to leave me alone over the summer, and they respect me enough to listen."

I nod slightly. "I don't want them to feel like you're pushing them away because of me." I mumble slightly.

"Honestly, they are fine. As Peter's said to me the other day. It's nice to see me happy. You make me happy Emily. And if they can't cope for one summer without me, then there is something extremely wrong with them." She gives me a slightly pointed look.

* * *

It had been a long week, I never realised just how much she worked, she rang a few times telling me she wasn't able to make it back, and for me to help myself to anything I wanted. She sounded tired when she spoke to me, and I wondered just how much rest she truly got when she was working. Sometimes she would be back over the weekend other times she was gone for six days straight. She would apologise each time. Yet it didn't faze me.

"I am so sorry; I feel awful for disappearing." She said as her arm wrapped around me.

"It's your job Amy. I fully understand, so stop worrying." I hear her sigh slightly.

"If I tell you what I do, promise me you won't leave?" I can hear the unease in her voice as she speaks.

"As long as you're not a serial killer, I won't. I promise."

I feel her swallow hard. I can feel her skin becoming slightly moist as though it is waiting for the pain to come. "You can't tell anyone Emily." She states

I laugh slightly. "Who on earth am I going to tell Amy? You're the only person I talk to, I have no friends, kind of the social outcast. And besides I could never betray your trust in me." I say honestly.

She nods against me as her hand tightens around me as though holding me in place so I don't run.

"I work for the CIA and Interpol." I can't help but pull away as I look at her.

"You're serious." I say as she looks at me slightly worried.

"I promise you Emily, I will never tell them about you. I swear." Her eyes fill with tears; I can feel the blood rushing around her body as her heart rate increases.

"Calm down." I say softly. "I'm not going anywhere." I sigh slightly. "I promise darling." She nods slightly as she takes a deep breath. "Stop panicking." I say as I close my eyes. The sound if deafening, the blood pumping around her body, her veins pulsating against her skin, her muscles twitching as she tenses more. "Please Amy." I say as I shake my head slightly. "I'm not going anywhere. I swear."

"You're not?" I smile softly at her.

"No, I know you wouldn't do that to me Amy. You've had plenty of chances to do that. And you haven't. now do you think you can do me a favour and calm down before you give me a headache." I say softly.

"Oh god Emily, I am so sorry."

I hold my hand up slightly. "Its fine, you didn't know." I chuckle slightly as I feel her body start to relax. "So what exactly do you do?" I ask, my curiosity is peaked.

"We infiltrate known gang members and the scum of the earth, we train undercovers to get close and feed intel back to us, so we can catch them. Hence I got into a fight with a bloke that time. The raid didn't exactly go to plan."

"Do you go undercover?" I ask, I'm unable to hide my concern.

"No. I will never do undercover work, and neither do any members of my team."

"Your team?"

She smiles at me, "Yes, hence Sarah didn't ask too many questions when I asked her to hack into the security cameras that night."

"Wow." I mumble.

"Shocked a woman is running a team?" she asks me.

"No, impressed." I laugh slightly.

The knock at the door pulled us from our thoughts, I closed my eyes slightly. "Who's got brown hair?" I can't help ask. "With glasses." I hear her groan slightly.

"Sarah." She shakes her head slightly. "I'll get rid of her."

I take hold of her hand before she disappears. "She's worried about you." I pause, "I don't mind, I promise I won't go and hide." I say softly as I watch a bright smile take over her face.

"You're sure?" she asks as I give a slight nod.

"I'm sure."

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay.

I can’t help my hands becoming sweaty as my heart rate increases, every nerve in my body is screaming at me to run. To hide away. It that’s me back to living with my parents. No one could understand me. Not fully, but Amy tries, not because she needs to, or because she has to. It’s because she wants to, she wants to know the real me. The only problem I have is, I’ve hidden myself for so long I don’t know who I truly am. I swallow slightly as I hear them coming down the hall.

I close my eyes slightly in an attempt to block her thoughts, no wonder Amy gets a headache. “Hi.”

“Sarah this is Emily.” I can’t help looking her up and down, as though I am sizing her up. Maybe I am?

“Nice to finally meet you.” I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone with a smile like that.

I stretch out my hand, I just need to remind myself. I can do this. “Nice to meet you too.” I can feel my skin twitching, the hairs standing to attention as though they are waiting for something. Panic. That’s what I feel, a deep seated panic.

“So what brings you here?” I can hear the firmness in Amy’s voice as she speaks and I am unsure if it’s a nice tone or not.

“I was worried about you.” I hear her sigh and I can’t help frowning at Amy.

“I told you, I am fine. I promise Sarah.” Her arm snakes around my waist as though she is holding on to me so I don’t bolt. “I’ll go make us all a drink.” She gives me one last squeeze before she disappears into the kitchen.

“How’s college?” I know I am biting the inside of my lip and I am almost certain she can see it. I take a breath.

“It’s going okay.” I was grateful it didn’t take Amy too long to reappear.

Have I been side-line that much that I truly don’t know how to talk to people? All the classes in the world can’t teach you that. I relax slightly as Amy sits down next to me, her arm automatically snaking around me, pulling me closer to her.

“What have you got planned for the weekend?” Her mind it like a treasure trove.

“Going to Peters and watching a film, I heard he might even light the barbeque. You should come?” I tense slightly at the offer.

Okay maybe I am not ready for this. Not ready to be judged yet again by people, people which are older than me. And what would happen if they found out. I trust Amy. I know she would never betray me like that.

“I told you Sarah, I want to spend time with Emily, besides we’ve got to get everything ready, we go away in a weeks’ time.” Her voice seemed softer this time as she spoke. “And honestly after this week I need some time away.” I could feel the tension travel through her body as she spoke.

“Maybe next time?” I chuckled slightly.

“Maybe.”

I was still tense I couldn’t help it. She was giving me such a headache, it wasn’t her fault and as harmless as she is. Her mind isn’t. my hand rests on Amy’s leg.

“You okay sweetheart?” I close my eyes as she speaks.

“Do you mind if I call it a night.” I say it in such a hushed voice it is more like a whisper.

“Headache?” She asks me as I nod. “I’ve put the pain killers on the nightstand. I smile my thanks before bidding them goodnight.

“Nice to meet you Sarah.” I give her a slight smile before kissing Amy on the cheek. “Night.” I can’t help the slight blush that covers my cheeks.

“Night sweetheart.”

* * *

 

“She seems nice” Sarah said softly as she watched Emily walk down the hall.

Amy chuckled slightly. “She is, she just extremely shy,” she closed her eyes slightly. “I thought I told you guys I wanted to be left alone this weekend.” Her voice had a slightly firmness but she knew Sarah. Sarah worried about everything, her heart was so big, Amy didn’t think it would be possible to find another sole like hers. So kind and pure.

“I know, I just.”

Amy chuckled slightly as she cut in “Worry.” Amy shook her head slightly. “I’m fine. I promise, I know you may find it hard to believe.”

“After what happened today yeah. I’m finding it hard to believe” Sarah said softly.

Amy sighed, she cast a glance towards the hallway. “She makes me okay.” Amy said with a slight blush.

“you love her?”

“I already told you I do. Sarah, I can’t explain it but with her. I’m whole, no matter what happens at work. No matter how bad it gets. I see Emily and all that melts away. The pain the hurt everything just.” She paused.

“Your soulmate.” Sarah said slightly amused, “thought you didn’t believe in that stuff.” She teased slightly.

“I don’t” Amy mused. “I just know she’s the one.”

“She’s very shy.” Sarah said with a chuckle.

“You have no idea.” Amy placed her glass down on the coffee table. “I think I need to Call it a night. I’ll see you at work. Okay?”

Sarah nodded, “Just so you know boss, she seems nice.”

“Good night Sarah.” Amy said as she closed the front door, she leaned her back against the hard-wooden door allowing it to ease her sore body slightly.

 


	11. Chapter 11

I haven’t met the rest of the team, I think Sarah gave me a headache that lasted all week. So much going on in her mind. I chuckled slightly.

“Penny for your thoughts?” her arm snaked around my waist.

“Just thinking about Sarah.” Okay maybe that was the wrong saying. I hold my hand up slightly. “Not like that.” I give her a pointed look. Did I just see her become jealous?

“Okay. What about Sarah?” there was a slight firmness behind her voice and in that second, I saw something vulnerable, I felt something from her. For the first time since I laid eyes on her. I can feel her emotions.

“Her mind is.” I try to think of the word but the tremor in her body, the stiffness of muscles. “colourful.” I study her for a moment. “Innocent.” I mutter as I take hold of her hand.  “Amy?” she is like a volcano waiting to erupt.

“That’s what has you chuckling to yourself?” I swallow as I hear the tremor in her voice.

“Yes. You tell me what you do for a job and then your friend and colleague comes around and her mind is like a child, as though she is sheltered from everything.” I pause slightly as I rest my hand on her cheek. “That’s all.” I don’t know why it comes out as a whisper.

She gives me a slight nod as though she doesn’t trust her voice. “Okay.”  

I place my lips on her cheek for a moment, but it’s in that second that I let words slip out of my mouth. “I love you.” I can’t help the smile that takes over her hold on me becomes a little tighter. Her lips meet my neck, I can feel the heat coming off her body, the small signs.

“Sorry.” She whispers.

“For what.” I turn giving her a pointed look. “Getting jealous?” I chuckle slightly as she nods her head. “It’s cute.” I say as I chuckle slightly, her hand meets my arm in a slight slap.

“Not funny.” She grumbles, her eyes glisten in the light.

I can’t help the laugh that now comes out my mouth I hold my hand up. “Sorry, I… its, I’ve never seen that side of you, even when people chat me up, you’ve never.” I pause slightly. I cup the side of her cheek as my lips make contact with her lips. “I only want you.” My voice is slightly hushed as I speak.

She closes her slightly before looking at me. “Damn.” I watch as she chuckles. “I didn’t, it’s just sometimes.” She lets out a sigh. “People haven’t really stuck around once they meet the team and find out how much I work.”

I wrinkle my nose slightly. “Good job I’m not like other people then. Isn’t it.” I give her a point look as she nods slightly. “But before I meet the rest of your team I need to find a way to.”

“Or have painkillers on standby?” she says as she laughs.

“Both.” I close my eyes slightly as I swallow. I take hold of her hand as I slowly tug her towards me. I smile as she easily comes towards me. I guide her down the hall to her bedroom.

“Emily, I.” she falters slightly.

“What?”

She shakes her head slightly. “Nothing.”

Maybe she can see the look in my eyes as I guide her down on to the bed. Maybe she can feel the heat and sweat that is starting to form on my skin. Maybe my body tells her what I want with words being spoken. It’s in this second I make a choice, a choice I daren’t to make all those weeks ago. But that was before I realised how much she meant to me. How much I loved her. How much I want her.

 

 

 


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